


What Should I Favour?

by saphique



Category: The Favourite (2018)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-10-12 22:51:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17476460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saphique/pseuds/saphique
Summary: Above all, I wish to be loved.Is it better to be feared?Is it sufficient to be listened to, obeyed?In lieu, should I ask to be respected?





	What Should I Favour?

Above all, I wish to be loved.

Is it better to be feared?

Is it sufficient to be listened to, obeyed?

In lieu, should I ask to be respected?

I wish I could reconstruct my past with Sarah, reposition our status, allowing us a chance to seduce ourselves over again, without the memories of our childhood. How compatible could we be without the affection we've been carrying towards each other since… forever? Oh, how I wonder what our dynamic would be like without the crown, the kingdom, the destiny? Will affection manifest itself naturally?  Would I survive her honesty and her rudeness? What about her, would she even be interested in me? Do we regrettably orbit around the throne? Like distant satellites rotating eternally over a foreign object, unrelated to our essence but so essential to our being?  

What if I need something else, something more than brief, occasional, illicit lovemaking and stolen kisses?  What if I crave genuine tenderness and kind words? Can this wish even be bearable when you're a queen?

Oh, how I adore Abigail's gentleness. She rarely hesitates, never speaks loudly, often giggles, mostly smiles, always encourage what amuses me. She wishes for my wellbeing before inquiring about my title. She asks how Anne, the individual, is doing before asking how Anne, the Queen, is doing. She wants me to have fun and feast, superficially. Sarah wants me to work and rest, fundamentally. As the Queen, I want everything. I can use both women, can't I?

Abigail's humongous and adorable eyes are taking part in my dreams. I feel like they're promising me that everything will be alright. I constantly need reassurance and her eyes comfort me. But Sarah's familiar, tired eyes are still warming my heart and her silhouette fulfills my daydreams.

What should I favour? Brutal honesty or playful indifference?

Above all, I wish to be loved.

Is it better to be feared?

Is it sufficient to be listened to, obeyed?

In lieu, should I ask to be respected?


End file.
